Her story

 She would have to do another night with gruel and chilies. “At least Mani can have something”, she thought.

There had been an abominable lull that summer. Potatoes and tomatoes got sold as always. But who would buy snake guard and drum sticks. There wasn’t an alternative though, was there?

Ravi anna transferred the cluster beans into a sack. She stared gloomily into the flickering flames of the kerosene lamp that danced on those dry, jet black eyes which were passive, like the calm after a storm, like the butt of a cigarette that glows brighter than usual before it finally snuffs out. The lamp had now extinguished and darkness prevailed. It would be hard, she reflected, this night, the one that would follow and the ones after that, indefinitely. It all started when he left to the town, to look for some livelihood.

 “It is getting late dear. Pack your stuff, your amma must be waiting.”

She transferred the vegetables into a yellow cloth bag, put it on Ravi anna’s cart and followed him silently.

It all seemed great in the beginning. There was a drought and farming was no longer possible. A job in the town with a decent income and she would then be able to resume her studies. So would Mani. Her asthmatic mother would not have to toil at the construction site too.Bearing the hopes of three thumping hearts he set out on a starless wintry night.

They waited anxiously to hear from him. Days passed, months went by and one day they got to hear that he had started living with another woman in the city. They were shattered. She wept bitterly. A dark shroud seemed to have engulfed them for eternity.

In that darkness a beast within stirred from its stupor, spitting fire, spurting flames. She resolved to fight to keep her family alive- If not for her, at least for Mani, to make him study. Her ill mother would not be able to do much. The money from selling their land could do for a year. Selling vegetables, working in some households, she would manage to run things till they found another viable option, she thought.

The tinkling of bells and her mother’s wheezing brought her out of the reverie. Kutty staggeringly stood up. A faint curve stretched on those dark lips as she absently stroked its back. The emaciated calf had seen it all and borne it with the family. They could not feed the mother and so sold it. But she could not bear to part with Kutty. It had strayed into their lives at twilight and they hoped to see through the night into dawn with it.

Mani came eagerly. “What did you get me akka?”

She ruffled his hair, handed him the parcel of food she had bought on the way. Her mother was lying on the pyol on a frayed mat. She handed over her earnings and walked in to have the frugal meal that awaited her.

The phone rang. “Hello Sudha here”

“Greetings madam, very glad to hear from you madam, tell me”

“Rama, all your prayers are answered. We have got a volunteer to sponsor your daughter’s education, after looking into her illustrious record. Please let her take it. You can work at the school too. We will be able to help your boy as well.”

Elated, her mother stumbled into the thatched hut.

The bowl of gruel lay in front of her. The last drops of water dripped from the pitcher, drenching her patched, faded skirt. Those jet black eyes in the sunken sockets were still. The fire within had died. An odd peace seemed etched on those dark features as they shone in the dim light of the lamp.